New Taiwan Ketchup Spaghetti: Recipes of the Unfortunate

Part of a series where individuals share their stories of misfortune and the recipes that got them through.

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THE CHEF

Bucky Feng Mian Zhōu, Operator, Taipei, New Taiwan

THE UNFORTUNATE STORY

We have discovered the universe

is a type of machine — self-sufficient.

The people are becoming free.

Only crustaceans will survive

the waters –– the healthy Japanese

will become ill with high cholesterol.

It will be commonplace.

We have read the recipes.

They have a supercomputer

that disseminates supersymmetries

across the lands –– the beauty

is so intoxicating to the masses

that they believe it to be a god.

An entity has been spitting out

anomalies in the cosmos from a source

we can only believe is Maitreya, existing

in a wormhole created by this

very communication, a rupture in the

quantum spaces and times –– it’s everything:

the incongruent and asymmetric, the wabi and

the sabi –– it compels change, mutating

the perceived superstructure: eat

more plants. Only the resourceful will

survives.

––

Here, a song written in

a time to come:

“Oh, Maitreya, where art thou?

The fields run barren, the chakras

amok, and the dharma forgotten

— we have lost the war.

Perfection has become the police,

enslaving man and child

to artificial rhythms of clocks

divorced from the solar system

now engrained on their heads.

They like to be like each other.

Joyous, they’ve become, in

synthesizing all life in

common mathematics and consensus.

Underground, we spend our days

as days themselves have become

short and filled with soot.

But through the black stratosphere

of digits and strange alloys,

a new sun swirls with young fire.”

THE RECIPE

Serves 2–3

INGREDIENTS

Much, much, much ketchup must be stored. Tomatoes difficult. Micro-greens and garlic –– the simpler species grow well hydroponically. Practice the extraction of protein from plants and other derivatives. Pasta and noodles hold over time.

DIRECTIONS

Boil water. Season with a pinch of salt. Add spaghetti noodles to water. About 2–3 tablespoons of vegetable-based oil in pan –– lightly simmer thin, thin, thin pieces of garlic –– about 3–4 cloves –– lightly cooking them. Extract flavor. Add 2–3 tablespoons of ketchup and 2 teaspoons of chopped herb like parsley to oil and garlic. Stir occasionally. Heat on low-medium heat until pasta in other pot is just a bit undercooked. Add undercooked pasta to sauce in pan. Save pasta water. Mix and cook the pasta in sauce. 2 teaspoons of soy sauce wow. Add a bit of pasta water if noodles look dry. Finish pasta al dente in sauce.

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